A Quick & Easy Guide to They/Them Pronouns (Archie Bongiovanni; Tristan Jimerson)

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I received an e-book copy in exchange for an honest review.


Goodreads Link

A cute and useful guide.

TL;DR – A whistlestop tour of They/Them pronouns and their use

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Ragdoll Rating: 4.5/5 Buttons

Recommended For: Everyone. Seriously, everyone needs to know about this stuff.

About the Book…

This book provides a very fast, bare-bones look at the usage of they/them pronouns and language. Lots of people (including me) use these gender-neutral pronouns, and it can be massively frustrating when people are either ignorant of gender-neutral language and pronouns, or worse, just refuse to use them. This book aims to remedy this by making they/them pronouns simple and easy to use.

What I thought…

I really liked this book, not just because it’s a subject close to my heart, but because it was really well executed. The book contains several pages of easy-to-use diagrams and tables to help make the concepts introduced as simple as humanly possible.

The book covers a lot of important areas, such as; How to use they/them pronouns, Miscellaneous gender-neutral language, WHY you should use gender-neutral language and so on. The content is presented by the authors in comic form, a non-binary hunkbabe, Archie, and a cis man, Tristan. Archie, who uses they/them pronouns allows the reader a real-life look at misgendering, and how it feels to not have your pronouns respected, while Tristan provides a look from the perspective of someone still learning about pronouns and non-binary folk. Tristan even admits at one stage to learning something new as the result of a mistake he made while writing the book, which I thought was a really good thing to include.

The book also briefly mentions other gender-neutral pronouns and demonstrates their use.

Final Thoughts…

This book breaks down a subject which a lot of people consider to be ‘too difficult to bother with’ into bite-size chunks, and demonstrates that gender-neutral language and pronouns are actually not that hard. Buy this book, give it to your friends. ❤

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Please Note: I received a copy of this book via netgalley in exchange for an honest review. The opinions contained within are my own and have not been influenced by any external entity!

Book Review: A Quick & Easy Guide to Queer & Trans Identities (Mady G)

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I received an e-book copy in exchange for an honest review.


Goodreads Link | Author Website

The book I wish I’d had a decade ago.

TL;DR – A cute, fun tour through the world of queerness

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Ragdoll Rating: 5/5 Buttons

Recommended For: Everyone. Especially anybody questions or recently out.

About the Book…

This book is very brief, but very informative tour through the world of identities, labels and relationships. The comics focus on the wisdom of a snail, who teaches a bunch of snail buddies about all the beautiful humans.

The book is broken into sections, each dealing with a different aspect of the queer experience. Each chapter is ended with a little summary comic featuring an adorable set of creatures known as Sproutlings.

What I thought…

As I said above, I wish I had had this book a decade or more ago. Transitioning was the result of years of questioning my sexuality and gender identity, and the whole period was a very difficult time. I still – 5+ years later – struggle with some aspects, and this book would have helped me a great deal.

Obviously I can’t speak for every queer person, but I personally feel that the content of this book is brilliant. It’s really inclusive, covering a wider variety of topics (albeit very briefly in some cases).

The book starts by discussing sexual orientation, and (correctly) declares it to be distinct from gender identity. Then there is a section on gender identity itself, including non-binary identities and the differences between identity and expression. It’s a really good chapter. Then we have a section on asexuality, something I find is often ignored in by a lot of people. The book finishes itself off with sections of advice, covering healthy relationships and coming out. Mady G makes great efforts to point out the fluid nature of identity, talks a lot about spectrums and how labels and concepts can differ from person to person. I think it’s really well done, and you can definitely tell it’s been written by someone with experience of what they are writing about.

I also love the illustrations, courtesy of J.R. Zuckerberg. I admit I’m slightly biased in this regard. If you want me to love anything, make it cute and I’m basically sold – and this book is CUTE. I love the Sproutlings, they are all my best friends and I want to live in their cute little forest. But ignoring my obvious bias, the illustrations are really lovely, they make what can feel like a difficult subject feel easier.

Finally, I want to mention the very last pages. Tucked away at the end of this book are a series of little activities – I assume aimed at the younger audience. Their inclusion is a really nice touch. The activities include, among other things, a section to write a letter to your younger self (something I know a lot of queer folk have found really helpful) and an invitation to design your own Sproutling. I just thought that was really cool.

Final Thoughts…

If I ever get hold of a time machine, I’m sending this book back to my teenage self. This is definitely a must read for anybody who needs a gentle guide into our big queer world.

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Please Note: I received a copy of this book via netgalley in exchange for an honest review. The opinions contained within are my own and have not been influenced by any external entity!

Professionals Choice: Conversations With Friends (Sally Rooney)

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Goodreads Link

This book was recommended to my by a bookseller (whose name I stupidly forget to take down) at my local bookshop (Toppings, Ely). This is what she had to say about it:

  • Sally Rooney has a wonderful understanding of the way people work.
  • This book is just an excellent look at how millennial life can be lived.
  • Everybody should be reading her.

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Rating: 5/5 Buttons

About the book…

Conversations With Friends is a snapshot of the lives of Frances, her best friend (and former partner) Bobbi, and their new, married friends Nick and Melissa. When Frances finds herself kissing Nick at a party, the pair begin a complicated affair and set in motion a chain of events that could lead to bliss, or heartbreak. Conversations… is a beautiful look into the world of queer and non-monogamous relationships.

Trigger Warnings: This book contains references to sex, self harm, alcoholism, mental and physical health problems. I think that’s everything.

What I thought…

The first thing to say is the Conversations With Friends is not the kind of book that I would usually read.

The second thing to say is that from now on, it definitely IS the kind of thing I’m going to read.

I’ll start with what drew me to the book. The honest answer is, I really don’t know. I had a stack of recommendations in front of me and something about this unassuming yellow paperback, that is nothing like anything else I’ve ever read just called out to me and I took it home. It might have been a subconscious yearning to read about queer relationships, but I really don’t know.

The story itself is all about the characters, Frances, Bobbi, Nick and Melissa. Frances in particular is amazing. Frances is hard to love at times, but easy to root for. I found her so relatable in so many ways. Her struggle to handle intimate attachments was so natural and believable. In her darkest moments, Frances looks back at old conversations with Bobbi, just to prove to herself that if everything else fails, once upon a time she had meant a lot to somebody. She struggles with self harm and body issues. Her romantic entanglements leave her confused and desperate to figure out her place in the world in relation to everyone else. I found it impossible not to see bits of myself in Frances, good and bad, and it made me feel a little less alone. The other characters just as well rounded and thought out.

The story in itself was engaging, I read the whole book in three sittings, and oh boy was it emotional. Rooney takes you effortlessly through a whole host of emotional states as the story progresses, and it’s so easy to feel what the characters are feeling, even if you haven’t experienced it yourself. I often found myself just wishing Frances could see the good in her darkest moments, but I knew that she couldn’t, and it was heartbreaking.

Finally, a note about adult content. It wasn’t until I had started reading this book that I suddenly realised that a book about adult relationships could very well have sexual content, which I’m really not that interested in. So I was worried about that. This book does have sexual content, but it isn’t explicit, or at least not gratuitous. It’s sex mentions and a small amount of detail, not pages and pages of smut.

Final Thoughts…

I’m super pleased that my first Professional’s Choice pick was such a rousing success. I would recommend this book to anybody who wants a beautiful story about life and love and sorrow. It is beautifully written, wonderfully engaging and a really super read.

I will definitely be picking up Normal People (Sally Rooney) next time I’m at the bookshop.

Personal: My First Pride

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Thanks for the Rainbow laces Stonewall 😀

Today was a good day.

If you read my bio (which you can find here: About Me…) then you will know that I fall firmly into the LGBTQIA+ camp. I’m trans / non-binary, and either a-sexual or pan-sexual, and either a-romantic or pan-romantic (it’s hard to tell when you share your head with other entities). I’ve been out and proud for over 5 years now, and I’ve never been to pride.

“Why not Holly?” I hear nobody asking! It’s because when I think pride, I think London. That honking great parade with quintillions of people, lots of noise and the big parade through the city. It’s like the worst possible combination of things for me. Also, I didn’t really see the point. Sure I’m queer, and it’s nice to be around other queers, but apart from my friends, I wouldn’t know anybody and I can hang with my friends without the crowds.

But this year, they did pride in Ely (which is 10 minutes down the road from me). They’ve never done it before, and Ely is pretty small, and my bestest buddy was going to be there anyway so I thought I’d go and see what it was like.

IT WAS GREAT.

I figured it would probably just be like any other Saturday fair that we have all the time, just something for ‘the family’ to do, and it was, BUT it was more.

The first thing I noticed was the amount of people walking around wearing pride flags like capes. This was awesome, but then it’s pride, people wear rainbows. Then I noticed it wasn’t just rainbows. There were trans flags, ace flags, pan, bi, all kinds of flags. There were queers EVERYWHERE! It was beautiful.

Ely is out in the sticks. There is nothing around, nothing to do. It’s really, REALLY easy to imagine that you are literally the only queer around. But suddenly there was loads of us, and we were all thinking the same thing:

I AM NOT ALONE!

I walked behind a pair of young people briefly, and one of them said, “Nobody told me what this would be like. I think I’m gonna cry!” This person had just seen me and my buddy walking around with pride flag capes, and they were clutching a little rainbow flag like it was the most important thing in the world, and I knew EXACTLY how that felt, because I felt it too.

It was just wonderful to see a celebration of queer folk in our out-of-the-way neck of the woods. People were happy and having fun, and you could feel how much it meant to the queer folk who were there. You could feel how important it was for each of them to realise just how not-alone they actually are.

Thanks Pride in Ely, can’t wait for next year!